Tag Archives: twitter

He woke up and it was all a ludicrous dream that he later wrote up into a best-selling novel…

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…For his crimes against humanity Dan Brown found himself on a blackened island at the centre of a sulphurous lake. Amidst noxious flames demons whispered that the pope was out to get him and that a sacred manuscript had been secreted somewhere deep inside his colon…

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Pipe-Dream My Ass…

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Tragedy struck today at The Science Expo. This photo captured the terrifying moment when Dr. Karen Roe, inventor of an invisibility serum, sat down on Hal Froom, founder of Shrinkray.com. A publicist for the famously roguish womaniser stated ‘It’s the way he would’ve wanted to go.’

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

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The Great Question Of Our Age…

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The other moths treated Gary like a pariah.

‘Why don’t you fly towards the light ‘Gary’? Illumination not good enough?’

He often wondered whether they’d ascended to the Promised Land, or ended their days concussed and in flames.

When asked what he believed in Gary replied:

Martin’s favourite jumper

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Stiff Upper Lip…(Twittering Tales)

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…Terribly sorry to impose upon you old chap, but might I beg a brief audience to articulate the pickle in which I find myself. Time is short (as is paper) so allow me to harness the power of brevity and proceed forthwith to the kernel of my concern. I am stranded on a des…

 

[END OF MESSAGE]

277 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

 

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Filed under Flash fiction, short story

Ivory Poaching…

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Into the fiery pit fell the fornicators; murderers, rogues and blasphemers, and as they frothed and flayed at the devils delight, Chris De Burgh began his song anew.

“The lady in red…”

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Filed under Flash fiction, short story

Twittering Tales: Pear-Shaped

Newton’s ex-wife never grew tired of cooking apple pies and dropping them on him from a great height, yelling Don’t blame me, blame gravity!

(140 Characters)

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Written for: Twittering Tales

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Twittering Tales: When Women Rule The Earth…

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I call this one: ‘Men argue over who has the best camera whilst woman takes epic photo.’ And this one’s: ‘Men miss Bigfoot flying UFO…and…’

 

140 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Filed under Flash fiction