Tag Archives: twitter

Ivory Poaching…

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Into the fiery pit fell the fornicators; murderers, rogues and blasphemers, and as they frothed and flayed at the devils delight, Chris De Burgh began his song anew.

“The lady in red…”

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Filed under Flash fiction, short story

Twittering Tales: Pear-Shaped

Newton’s ex-wife never grew tired of cooking apple pies and dropping them on him from a great height, yelling Don’t blame me, blame gravity!

(140 Characters)

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Written for: Twittering Tales

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Filed under Flash fiction

Twittering Tales: When Women Rule The Earth…

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I call this one: ‘Men argue over who has the best camera whilst woman takes epic photo.’ And this one’s: ‘Men miss Bigfoot flying UFO…and…’

 

140 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

2 Comments

Filed under Flash fiction

Twittering Tales: Are you trying to make us extinct?

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“I know we’re delicious, but if we SheepWolves keep eating ourselves we’ll go the way of the dodo, the teriyaki turtle and the chocolosolot”

 

140 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

2 Comments

Filed under Flash fiction

Twittering Tales: Let’s Get Tattoos…

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With each stab of ink the message slowly revealed itself: I’ve only paid up to the words ‘I’ve poisoned you’. Wire £1m for the antidote…

 

138 Characters

 

Written for: Twittering Tales

2 Comments

Filed under Flash fiction

Henpecked Incorporated…

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With Faithful Jenny deliberately scuttled there was no going back. The rip-tides in the bay were well renowned, and the lack of a body would be easily explainable.

He outstretched his arms and let go of everything – his materialistic trophy wife, the kids who hated him, the stock portfolio, the endless competing with other alphas – all expelled in a single glorious belch of freedom.

Hidden behind a rocky outcrop he encountered two other men – one standing in the mangled wreckage of a hang glider, the other kneeling by a bloated cadaver. He greeted them with nervous exhilaration and gave a false name as he’d been instructed. They reciprocated.

‘The likeness is uncanny,’ he commented, gesturing towards the cadaver.

”I paid extra. It’s a little macabre stealing from a morgue, but it’s not like anyone was murdered!’

A speedboat was moored at the tip of the archipelago. With a fair wind they’d be in Gibraltar by morning where a vagabond utopia awaited…

 

164 Words

Written for: Flash Fiction For Aspiring Writers

18 Comments

Filed under Flash fiction

Twittering Tales: Manoeuvres Against Humanity…

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Greg was a fine father, a great cook and always made the guys on the bowling team howl with glee, but he was also hogging the middle lane, so he was ultimately an asshole!

 

138 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

7 Comments

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