Twittering Tales: Can’t reach the ‘Off’ switch…

Initially, being accidentally shrunk down to the size of an amoeba sucked, until he discovered other scientists the size of atoms and took up residence as their god.

 

139 Characters

Written for: Twittering Tales

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Immunity

He took the role reluctantly and with a heavy heart. Events had sliced open a vacancy and duty required that he step to the plate, but such undertakings were not meant for family men. As the mantra bludgeoned:

They come for you via your children. 

So he gathered them together, his little ones, and told them of his quest, and then he kissed them goodbye.

The path was not straight and he become entrenched in subterfuge and recrimination.  Years passed, till one mundane morning he glimpsed his eldest daughter through armoured glass. He prayed she would see the number plate and recognise its significance; follow its clues and find what he had left for her…

Written for: Friday Fictioneers

Twittering Tales: Ethel Ethereal

Every morning the same missive: “Is that you Jimmy? I know you poisoned me! Goddammit! Why couldn’t I have possessed something with Wi-Fi?” (139 characters)

Written for: Twittering Tales

Flash Fiction: Preordained

Richard was fond of saying: ‘There’s something cathartic about knowing where you’ll end up,’ but in truth the photograph was the death of him.

He was just a minor when they lowered his father’s body into the earth.

‘Seven generations of Langhams languish in this graveyard,’ an ancient aunt alliterated, ‘and one day you too will reside here with the tree roots nestling against your belly.’

The words burrowed their way into his impressionable little mind and set him on a path of narcissistic self-reflection. Richard kept the photo about his person at all times and haunted himself long before he became a ghost.

 

Written for: Saturday Mix

Flash Fiction…

I’m in the process of touting various manuscripts around literary agents at the moment, but am also entertaining a few quirkier pastimes, one of which is Flash Fiction: the practice of telling a story in approximately 50 words. Here are a few of my efforts…

 

Paradox

‘I’m you from the future. Thirty years from now you’ll invent time-travel and prevent nuclear catastrophe.’

‘So, what you’re saying is that I grow up to be a fat, slap-head with horrendous body odour? Screw that, I’m ditching the books and hitting the gym.’

 

‘Serendumbity’

Harry conceived an idea of genuine genius.

‘This will change everything!’

Running to tell the world he tripped, fell and became concussed. He awoke in a hospital with memory loss. A nurse offered him a snack. He’d forgotten the nut allergy. He flailed and banged his head.

‘This will change everything!’

 

Theatre People

As he began his soliloquy Horatio called to mind Freya’s advice: The best way to overcome your stage fright is to imagine the audience naked.

A woman in the lower-circle had loin-conquering breasts and he was subsequently fired for delivering his pivotal death scene with a monstrous erection.

 

Consultancy

‘Tonight’s the night. At light’s out we make good our escape. Tommy, have you acquired the guard uniforms?’

‘Yep.’

‘And Jake – the fake passports?’

‘Check.’

‘And Sebastian – Is the tunnel complete?’

‘About that…the solutioning phase went well, but due to scope creep we’ve only just commenced the spade optimisation phase.’

 

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