Keep the Lexicans out…(100ww)


Ron Lexican was the greediest man to ever walk the earth. There was nothing he wouldn’t shamelessly usurp – other people’s land, other people’s wives

It got so bad that his neighbours banded together to build a big, beautiful wall with which to contain him.

When Ron learned of their treachery his cheeks burned incandescent orange with rage. He attempted to scale the spiky barrier but his tiny hands were not up to the task…

…So he tweeted out insults, but alas the wall was fitted with a device that blocked internet traffic. Ron was never heard from again #SAD…

(100 words)

Written for: Friday Fictioneers (100 word fiction)


Filed under Flash fiction

34 responses to “Keep the Lexicans out…(100ww)

  1. Dear Martin,

    I think you mean ‘he’ in the first line rather than ‘we’.

    Would that it were so easy to pen someone up like that. Well done. #good job.



  2. Where can we get one of those walls?

  3. I’m not sure whether having Ron missing in action is so good after all. More a case of liking to know where he is and what he’s up to instead of being at large.

  4. Laughing.
    I can’t help feeling this reminds me of someone, just can’t put my finger on it…

  5. Dale

    Ugh. I’m all Trumped out…
    Well-written, though 😉

  6. Ron reminds me of someone. I’m not too sorry he’s #SAD.

  7. Gee. I wonder who you’re really talking about? 😉

  8. Oh, if only truth would follow fiction and he really was never heard of again…

  9. Lynn Love

    Ah, if only. We all have someone we’d like to wall in! Nicely done Martin

  10. That reminded me of someone… bigly. 😦 Good one!

  11. Thank you for this, Martin. I love the humor of it–a really good way to deal with the current Orange Infection.

  12. Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha…I was quite amused.

  13. Life Lessons of a Dog Lover

    For those of us living in the US I think we are at the point that if we don’t keep laughing we will start to cry. This was a great laugh.

  14. Very amusing. You should send a link to someone in power. See if you can get a tweet….. rofl

  15. You never fail to deliver my good, unlike the cheeto in this one. Was laughing so hard!!

  16. Sarcastic and subtle. Well done.

  17. Strangely, I’d almost forgotten about that someone. I’ve been embroiled in research for the last few months and it’s been blissful relief. You’ve also got to hope that Australia’s isolation has a few benefits as well.
    xx Rowena

  18. That would be a big, beautiful wall indeed. And how clever for it to block internet traffic!

  19. We need this wall around a certain orange menace stat! Loved the humor, well done.

  20. HA HA … someone needs to be monitored. A vague familiarity in this tale.
    Tiny hands may have given it away. Muy Bueno ….
    Isadora 😎

  21. gahlearner

    If only, if only… laughing is the only thing the world can do right now about the orange ordeal.

  22. Hummm… sounds familiar. The image of the tiny man trying to scale the fence is so funny!

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